i didn't think that band-aids were real skin colors. really i didn't. and then i put one on yesterday and looked down and what do you know? i'm band-aid colored. this photo doesn't really do me or the band-aid justice, but honestly - it's kind of creepy how well it matches.
these are actually the kind of thoughts that consume minutes of my day.
i was driving the other day -- rushing rushing -- always rushing -- and i had the thought -- i wonder what it would be like not to multi-task. to actually have enough time in the day to do what you wanted to do AT THE PACE you wanted/needed to do it.
we now hear all these buzz words - slow food, slow media, slow fashion [i'm tossing this one around for another side project i'm working on. but that's another post]. but i never do anything slowly really. except for when i'm actually making art.
my brain is full of ideas. grandiose and minuscule art ideas. ideas that make me want to drop everything else i'm doing - which is simply impossible and unreasonable. but my head - it wants to explode with thoughts of kites, cloud formations, viruses, toxins, balloons, bombs, slovakian bobbin lace, and military ribbons.
and then there's the whole color study work i want to do. nothing but thread and stitching and colors. really quiet. shhhh. all about texture and subtlety and getting back to the basics. but that would be kind of a left turn from what i need to complete and things i've promised to folks. i do want to get there... but i may have to be patient.
i've been inspired by these double sided colleen colored pencils that i first spied here . i like the idea of making drawings using their color combos. sometimes i find it relaxing if one element of what i'm working on is determined by some outside force. the scale, or the color, or something. it makes me feel like i have one less thing to worry about.
i'm working on these very small drawings for an upcoming show - and i found i really had to push myself to use more than 1 or 2 colors. i tend to like small shifts in a color family - like a bunch of teals and greens or several pinks and browns together. throw in one more color and i start getting twitchy. i'm trying to use at least 3 colors in some of them [the work is kind of all about 3] and it's making me work really hard. i think this is good, but part of me is still complaining.
i've also been thinking about pressure. it came up with one of my students who has had some early success with showing and selling his work. he said making art right now isn't as much "fun" as it was before because he has all these extra voices and thoughts in his head right now. i feel for him. the best moments in the studio [for me] are when you are present and yet also somehow in some other world - where you don't really have any "everyday" thoughts in your head and you aren't worried. you are just kind of making. it's hard to banish the outside temptations, influences, general "noise". i'm have a particularly hard time of it now. but i'm going to practice what i preach [to my students] which is to soldier on. discipline through it.
on that note. back to work. i have to re-write my artist statement for a proposal. this proposal is big. it's daunting. if i get what i wish for it will be pretty amazing. and that's all i'll say for fear of jinxing it.
happy wed.
i love all this. the noise, the lack of noise, the colors, the fleeting thoughts, the notes on discipline. yes, yes.
So many things here I can relate to, even the band-aid. I haven't used a band-aid in a long time, but needed one on Monday. My well-bronzed band-aid was much darker than my lily white leg : )
so many good things in this post. you never fail to inspire me. wish i could come over and play with those colored pencils. xo
Good one, sis. I think maybe cooking is the only time I really slow down...
Let me know if you want help writing/editing the bio and/or proposal. (That was a lot of slashes, I know...)
i hear you too. i long for that quiet...
what is quiet? i hear it when i first wake up, and then whoosh it's gone. way to much noise going on in my head now - more than ever, it's hard to keep up.
help!
: )
The colour of a band-aid... ha! This little observation of yours (and accompanying photo) made me smile and now I am ever so curious to know what colour form I might be.
People in the sports world talk about "being in the zone:" when one is totally immersed in the moment, not aware of/bothered by any other thoughts, and performing at one's best. It is wonderful when one can achieve it...if only for a few fleeting moments!
as usual, really enjoyed reading your thoughts. i could read your posts for hours...
and those coloured pencils look so delicious! xx
I just wanted to wish you and your family a happy Thanksgiving and much continued success with your work. Take care.
Once again your words inspire me so much. I wish I could put my thoughts into words like you do. I also feel the noise, and the voices. I don't know much about anything so I tend to think others might have a better approach to art or know better. Sometimes I wish someone could take me by the hand (I'm sure your an excellent art teacher at this point) and make my life and my goals easier.
I'm sure there will come a time that you'll be able to create at your very own pace. Just struggle until you get there. Hugs.
You're 'band-aid colored?!', heehee you crack me up! I think you're doing a brilliant job with the self-discipline despite having to look after a young CC, while at the same time not losing that creative spark filled with ideas. It's a wonderful example to follow, bravo!
Wow.
Lisa, you always leave me with so many things to think about. I'm smiling at the thought of a band aid colored you and wondering what life would be like if I s l o w e d down a bit.
I can tell you what, when I am walking to work or walking to do my errands-life seems more simple-more magical. If only I could carry that with me...
I hope you and your lovely family have a joyous holiday tomorrow.
Also, today is hug a robot day-I'll hug one for you :)
i just came here via esti, and everything you've said here is spot-on and so beautifully written.
I too am dreaming and hoping and visualising...the day when I will have found that slower pace- I sometimes think my children will remember me like this only- rush, rush, rush- I try to force myself to slow down the moments- if you can imagine that- I am still rushing but I try to focus completely on the one thing I am doing- I have to stop multitasking because my brain shuts down- !!I wish you the best, best luck with your proposal-
Annamaria :)
Such a lovely post! Oh and the band aid thing, I always wondered who would match those ;) now i know!
i know i posted
a comment here...
i wonder if
they get lost
in the ether.
i put those
pencils
on my xmas list
but i doubt i will get
them...
i can dream...
xoxo